Jean-Ralphio Singing At People
REALEST zodiac sign stuffAries: self-centred competitive cunts but still sweet
Taurus: nice as heck but dont show much emotions and eat a way too much
Gemini: smooth lunatic manipulative assholes but geniuses
Cancer: dependant, emotionally unstable lullabies and probably the nicest persons you know
Leo: most generous and selfish at the same time attention whores
Virgo: steady fuckers that probably have an OCD
Libra: double-faced childish bitches but they know how to look good tho
Scorpio: paranoid psychos that think about dry humping all day long
Sagittarius: funny but rude, one night stands big winner
Capricorn: cold-hearted motherfuckers without any social skills
Aquarius: weird hipsters that always try to sound deep and different but VERY open-minded
Pisces: sensible compulsive liars, daydreamers and super gentle but hypocrites
Fuck, my tea.
me approximately an hour after every time I make tea (via madopiano)
basically my life can be summed up in alternating periods of Linda Belcher’s “Alriiiiight!” and Bob Belcher’s “Oh my god”
DOWNTON ABBEY S5 OFFICIAL TRAILER
life is so hard when your best pal is a 9.5/10 and you’re a strong 4 with the right filter and lighting
do you ever get in those moods where you don’t feel like reading and you don’t feel like being on the internet and you don’t feel like watching a show and you don’t feel like sleeping and you don’t feel like existing in general
BUT YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING.It’s in words
talk to kids like they’re people and take full interest in what they’re saying because they’re forming their personalities and it’s really vital that they know that their opinions are important and what they have to say deserves validation and respect. so when your three year old niece tells you that dragons don’t like cupcakes because the color blue is a spoon you better nod your head and ask her to explain more about that.
something that i miss about childhood? well people don’t ask me what my favorite shape is anymore. adults just don’t do this. it’s a triangle in case you were wondering. you don’t care
Spoiler alert: adulthood is 96% of you going “well, I hope this is how it works and I’ll keep doing it till someone yells at me”
I’ll marry a man who knows how I take my tea, coffee, and alcohol
And knows when to make which.
How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man: I never filled out an application.
Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Man: Fuck you, slut.
When the U8 goes to Hermannstrasse again
Submitted by Svenja Trierscheid
Having a pet is so weird. Like neither of you speak each other’s language and yet you form some strong bond by rubbing against each other and sleeping together and you might accidentally kick them in the face or step on their tail once in a while but at the end of the day you two are best buddies from entirely different species.