talk to kids like they’re people and take full interest in what they’re saying because they’re forming their personalities and it’s really vital that they know that their opinions are important and what they have to say deserves validation and respect. so when your three year old niece tells you that dragons don’t like cupcakes because the color blue is a spoon you better nod your head and ask her to explain more about that.
something that i miss about childhood? well people don’t ask me what my favorite shape is anymore. adults just don’t do this. it’s a triangle in case you were wondering. you don’t care
Spoiler alert: adulthood is 96% of you going “well, I hope this is how it works and I’ll keep doing it till someone yells at me”
I’ll marry a man who knows how I take my tea, coffee, and alcohol
And knows when to make which.
How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man: I never filled out an application.
Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Man: Fuck you, slut.
When the U8 goes to Hermannstrasse again
Submitted by Svenja Trierscheid
Having a pet is so weird. Like neither of you speak each other’s language and yet you form some strong bond by rubbing against each other and sleeping together and you might accidentally kick them in the face or step on their tail once in a while but at the end of the day you two are best buddies from entirely different species.
really sick of seeing so much hate directed towards the police on here. look, we get it, you prefer sting’s solo work, i like it too alright? that doesnt mean ‘every little thing she does is magic’ and ‘can’t stand losing you’ arent awesome jams. ‘roxanne’ and ‘don’t stand so close to me’ are classic, don’t even get me started on ‘spirits in the material world’. just stop ok?
I hate being told to do something I was already planning on doing
like I was all about doing this task, and then you told me to do it and now i am annoyed and this task is now 300x less likely to be completed
"i can’t eat that, i’ll get fat"
"i can’t sleep in late today i have to do work"
"no i can’t watch a whole season in one go that’s lazy"
I hate when guys are like “oh you’re not one of those girls that’s going to order a salad for dinner are you?” MAYBE I AM. MAYBE I FUCKING LIKE SALADS. HAVE YOU EVEN TASTED RASPBERRY VINAIGRETTE.
trying to figure out someone else’s shower
girls think having a period sucks but try having to fix your penis discreetly through your pocket
having the insides of your organs shed and come out through your genitals does not compare to having displaced balls sorry
none of you can do it discreetly anyways
we see you
everyone sees you
White people destroyed 3/4s of the world for spices and have the nerve not to season their food.
this post wont die
*hears a single word from a foreign language that i know* Wow. haha not to toot my own horn or anything but did you guys know that you are in the presence of a sophisticated linguist